Sigh of Relief
Well, we got some good news last week. I am feeling relieved, though still stressed as hell about Nadia’s cancer. I am over the shock and starting to feel a little bit pissed about the whole thing, but I am still functional.
Nadia remains completely functional (almost hyper functional) and fearless or delusional, depending on how you look at it. The only reason why I say she might be sort of ‘delusional’ is because she doesn’t seem phased by it.I think that part of it is because she doesn’t have any symptoms. But, if it were me, I would be under my bed, with torn clothes, shaking and screaming ‘why?’ but she hasn’t done any of that. I think that she has the right attitude to beat this thing so I don’t want to bring her down, but I can’t exactly relate. Then again, maybe I don’t need to.
Anyhoo, we went to see a surgeon who told us that she would definitely recover from the c-word. She will have surgery next month and then radiation about two months later, but he was extremely positive and upbeat. He was very soothing. We left his office feeling a bit high.
Whew!
I was feeling pretty good about what I had read online about papillatory thryoid cancer but, of course, nothing beats hearing a verdict from a seasoned medical professional. He spoke with confidence and looked her directly in the eye. We loved him but I also scheduled another consultation with another doctor tomorrow. I’ve been in love with doctor’s before. I need results. We need to have someone to compare him to. I wish I had done that when selecting an RE, instead of just following the suggstion of my gyno. But I need to move on…
The interview process will start all over again, when we have to select an endocrynologist to administer Nadia’s radiation treatment, but we will cross that bridge when we come to it.
Needless to say, the TTC journey is on the back burner, indefinitely. But you know me. I have to keep the fire simmering. In the meantime and between time, I am seeing a new acupuncturist who is very sweet. I am also taking Chinese herbs twice a day–yuck. Dr. Sweet remmends that women work with her for three months before they try IVF again, but that the woomen often choose to wait six months, so things might work out for me. I predict that it will take Nadia three to six months to recover completly, probably closer to three months from now, but we will see. I am keeping my fingers crossed.
Next week, Nadia and I are going to see one fertility specialist but I certainly won’t have any inseminations– not even the two natural ones I need to pay for- until she is completely fine and we can start arguing about the whole things again. Those were the days…
I am going to change my blog a little to incorporate this new develompent in my life. I love my Nadia and can’t imagine life without her, thank God I don’t have to, but the c-word is definitely now a part of my life now. I intend to blog about it consitently, now that I am over the initial shock of this nightmare.
Thanks again for all of your love and support. It means the world to me.





