In A Pickle: What Would You Do?

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In A Pickle: What Would You Do?

16th August 2008

In A Pickle: What Would You Do?

posted in TTC |

Okay, so as you know, I am getting myself in gear for my next IVF cycle. After talking to my doctor and reading everything I can get my hands on about IVF, I am pretty sure that I will have to take off two days after the egg retrieval and one day after the transfer.

Now I just started my new job on July 1. Should I tell my boss that I’m having a procedure done and that I’ll need to take some days off, even though I can’t predict when those will be? or should i just call in sick? I definately don’t feel comfortable telling her that I want to get pregnant and that I am going to do in-vitro.

What would you do?

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There are currently 14 responses to “In A Pickle: What Would You Do?”

Why not let us know what you think by adding your own comment! Your opinion is as valid as anyone elses, so come on... let us know what you think.

1 On August 16th, 2008, Malea said:
Just tell her you are having a procedure done that may require some recoop time.If she finds out it’s pregnancy related she might start to look for a replacement anticipating lots of absenses.

If you say your sick and she calls the house and you’re out the shit will hit the fan.Or someone mentions they saw you out and about….more shit.
2 On August 16th, 2008, Sarah said:
As a former HR lady, I’d say just say you are having a procedure that is timed with your cycle, so it is a little unpredictble, and it you are going to be on bedrest for two days (and believe me, you’ll need it, those ovarys are gonna be SORE), and that there will be a follow up in 3 to 5 days that will likely require you to take the day off as well. You will get a sense as the cycle proceeds whether it will be when they predicted or not (mine was 2 days earlier than predicted and I had to miss the last seciton of a class I was teacing!)
It isn’t anyone’s business what your medical needs are, but bosses are generally more sympathetic if they think it can’t be avoided than if you call in ’sick’. Also, this will give you a chance to be prepared and have coverage or reschedule meetings without having to be cagy and evasive (as in, uh I don’t know if I can meet with you that week…)
2 cents given.
3 On August 17th, 2008, dakota said:
I’m in the same predicament as you are Eva. I agree with Sarah for all the reasons she mentioned. Your having a procedure, the timing is a bit unpredictable since it is timed with your cycle,…and then what you’ll need.
4 On August 17th, 2008, queerstork said:
Good points above but my first instinct was to call in sick. I would certainly not tell my boss what the procedure was that I was going in for.
5 On August 17th, 2008, giggleblue said:
um, i would want to call in sick, just because i see that as being easier, and it’s only two days and then one day.

i wouldn’t be out of the house and about, so i wouldn’t worry about someone seeing me after i called in sick. you need to rest! stay at home.

but i can also see telling her in advance, but just saying that you are a having a medical proceedure coming up, and the date is not quite yet set. i would present this as a way to help get your responsibilities in order before your time off, and send the message that you are concerned about not leaving them assed out.

i guess it depends on the demand of your job - if life can go on without you without much effort or planning, call in sick. but if you miss a day and it’s going to seriously inconvience someone, tell in advance so they can make preparations, even if you don’t know the exact date. just say you are waiting on more tests (which is true!)
6 On August 17th, 2008, Lo said:
I agree with above commenters — just say you need a medical procedure. End of story. These things always make me nervous, but I see other people state their needs to bosses with such confidence — like, hello, of course I will get what I need. So go for it!!
7 On August 18th, 2008, Calliope said:
I think Sarah said it perfectly. (although my gut instinct would have been to just call in sick)
8 On August 19th, 2008, Kat said:
Don’t call in sick. I think you should try to talk to your supervisor. I think if she feels as if you confided in her, it will pay off in the long run. Gaining her trust will be key in these early months at your job. Good Luck xo
9 On August 19th, 2008, malea said:
Kat I think Eva can ask Gia about “trusting” your supervisor to understand:(
10 On August 21st, 2008, A Pretty Mess » Blog Archive » Women, the Workplace, and Their Damn Internal Organs said:
[...] is all over the board on the decision whether or not to tell employers about treatments. Egg Drop Post had a post this week about whether or not to tell a new employer about an upcoming IVF procedure. [...]
11 On August 21st, 2008, Alex said:
Here from Stirrup Queens.

I wouldn’t tell. I didn’t tell. If you want to tell at all (I just called in sick), I would, indeed, go with it being something cycle related. If your boss were male, I’d consider just saying “female issues,” but my guess is with a woman boss that might provoke further questions.

Good luck to you.
12 On August 24th, 2008, Not On Fire said:
If you are looking for a good lie, I would go with Dental Surgery. Everyone gets that and it has no long term problems.
13 On August 25th, 2008, Sarah said:
Have you figured out how you are going to manage your nearly daily sonograms?
14 On August 26th, 2008, oneofhismoms said:
Call in sick for a medical procedure. I had to do it for my IUI that worked. They wouldn’t let me take a half-day off.