Comments on: A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to…. http://www.eggdroppost.com/2008/07/22/a-funny-thing-happened-on-the-way-to/ Tue, 06 Jan 2009 09:08:23 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.5.1 By: cady http://www.eggdroppost.com/2008/07/22/a-funny-thing-happened-on-the-way-to/#comment-841 cady Wed, 06 Aug 2008 20:11:22 +0000 http://69.89.22.108/~eggdropp/?p=352#comment-841 my husband and i found out earlier this year that we have fertility issues and have been seeing an re ever since. i still get *so* mad when i hear someone is pregnant. like my friend who isn't married and doesn't even want to be pregnant. our joe's friend who knocked up his girlfriend and they had to have a quickie wedding. or my brother and his wife who weren't even trying and literally found out they were pregnant when he took her to the hospital and said, "my wife's been sick every day for the last few weeks." i've told joe that i can't talk to people about baby things right now because i'm just so upset that we can't get pregnant. your feelings are totally normal. we all feel that way. my husband and i found out earlier this year that we have fertility issues and have been seeing an re ever since. i still get *so* mad when i hear someone is pregnant. like my friend who isn’t married and doesn’t even want to be pregnant. our joe’s friend who knocked up his girlfriend and they had to have a quickie wedding. or my brother and his wife who weren’t even trying and literally found out they were pregnant when he took her to the hospital and said, “my wife’s been sick every day for the last few weeks.” i’ve told joe that i can’t talk to people about baby things right now because i’m just so upset that we can’t get pregnant. your feelings are totally normal. we all feel that way.

]]> By: Kymberli http://www.eggdroppost.com/2008/07/22/a-funny-thing-happened-on-the-way-to/#comment-796 Kymberli Thu, 24 Jul 2008 05:34:13 +0000 http://69.89.22.108/~eggdropp/?p=352#comment-796 I know just how you feel. I was pummeled constantly through my 17-year old sister's pregnancy. I was her sister so I *had* to put on my big girl panties and be supportive of her. Let me tell you - at least for me, participation didn't dilute anything. Different strokes for different folks. If you need to shelter yourself from it, I think that's a perfectly acceptable route, too. I know just how you feel. I was pummeled constantly through my 17-year old sister’s pregnancy. I was her sister so I *had* to put on my big girl panties and be supportive of her. Let me tell you - at least for me, participation didn’t dilute anything. Different strokes for different folks. If you need to shelter yourself from it, I think that’s a perfectly acceptable route, too.

]]> By: sara http://www.eggdroppost.com/2008/07/22/a-funny-thing-happened-on-the-way-to/#comment-794 sara Thu, 24 Jul 2008 00:07:45 +0000 http://69.89.22.108/~eggdropp/?p=352#comment-794 I'm sorry-- this is so hard. I feel like so many people around me have gotten pregnant since we started trying-- and so many of them did not want babies (allegedly). I have to disagree with the commenter above who encouraged you to get involved and chat baby stuff-- I say, feel ok about protecting yourself. It is ok to stay away from the topic, to not see her as much, and even to not go to the baby shower. One thing I have learned through this process is that I have to be better at protecting myself. I’m sorry– this is so hard. I feel like so many people around me have gotten pregnant since we started trying– and so many of them did not want babies (allegedly). I have to disagree with the commenter above who encouraged you to get involved and chat baby stuff– I say, feel ok about protecting yourself. It is ok to stay away from the topic, to not see her as much, and even to not go to the baby shower. One thing I have learned through this process is that I have to be better at protecting myself.

]]> By: Cassandra http://www.eggdroppost.com/2008/07/22/a-funny-thing-happened-on-the-way-to/#comment-792 Cassandra Wed, 23 Jul 2008 04:41:51 +0000 http://69.89.22.108/~eggdropp/?p=352#comment-792 Here from ICLW. I love the design of your site! This happens to me more often than not. I am filled with things aside from pure joy when any of the following get pregnant: people who are too young (the age cutoff changes depending on my mood), people who weren't actually trying, people who get pregnant on the first try (or close to it), people who have been married less than 6 months, people who I think will be bad parents, people who can't handle the kids they've already got, people I don't like... Also, even when I'm also happy for them, pregnancy news is more painful coming from family. Your 99.9% is very impressive! You shouldn't feel bad at all. Best of luck with your IVF cycle! Here from ICLW. I love the design of your site!

This happens to me more often than not. I am filled with things aside from pure joy when any of the following get pregnant: people who are too young (the age cutoff changes depending on my mood), people who weren’t actually trying, people who get pregnant on the first try (or close to it), people who have been married less than 6 months, people who I think will be bad parents, people who can’t handle the kids they’ve already got, people I don’t like…

Also, even when I’m also happy for them, pregnancy news is more painful coming from family.

Your 99.9% is very impressive! You shouldn’t feel bad at all.

Best of luck with your IVF cycle!

]]> By: Sarah http://www.eggdroppost.com/2008/07/22/a-funny-thing-happened-on-the-way-to/#comment-791 Sarah Tue, 22 Jul 2008 22:56:29 +0000 http://69.89.22.108/~eggdropp/?p=352#comment-791 I know how it is. A good friend, who I would dearly love to raise my children alongside, has just starting TTC. On one hand I want her to get pregnant and not suffer gd'd IF, on the otehr, I don't want her to get pregnant before I do--it will just hurt so much. I know how it is. A good friend, who I would dearly love to raise my children alongside, has just starting TTC. On one hand I want her to get pregnant and not suffer gd’d IF, on the otehr, I don’t want her to get pregnant before I do–it will just hurt so much.

]]> By: Malea http://www.eggdroppost.com/2008/07/22/a-funny-thing-happened-on-the-way-to/#comment-790 Malea Tue, 22 Jul 2008 18:38:08 +0000 http://69.89.22.108/~eggdropp/?p=352#comment-790 Your feelings in this situation are understandable and human. Maybe if you could push yourself in a more positive direction with her pregnancy it will help you get over those negative emotions.I have found that forcing myself to say kind things to them and maybe even try to join in on the babytalk joy helps.Participation sorta dilutes the anger,jealousy,and envy imo.I don't have a poker face and it's hard for me to hide my true feelings,so it's important that *I* work to get past issues I have with others:)Ohterwise they'll pick up on it and the awkwardness insues:/ Your feelings in this situation are understandable and human. Maybe if you could push yourself in a more positive direction with her pregnancy it will help you get over those negative emotions.I have found that forcing myself to say kind things to them and maybe even try to join in on the babytalk joy helps.Participation sorta dilutes the anger,jealousy,and envy imo.I don’t have a poker face and it’s hard for me to hide my true feelings,so it’s important that *I* work to get past issues I have with others:)Ohterwise they’ll pick up on it and the awkwardness insues:/

]]> By: Cece http://www.eggdroppost.com/2008/07/22/a-funny-thing-happened-on-the-way-to/#comment-789 Cece Tue, 22 Jul 2008 16:32:35 +0000 http://69.89.22.108/~eggdropp/?p=352#comment-789 We all have those moments. I cried when I found out my SIL was pregnant. 3 months after her wedding. And she wasn't even trying. I'm not proud - but that is what IF does to you. Blessedly, I'm pregnant now too - and haven't had any issues - she, on the other hand, has been throwing up daily, having major problems sleeping, and big allergy issues. I smile a bit when she calls to complain about how hard her pregnacy is. And then I feel a little evil. We all have those moments. I cried when I found out my SIL was pregnant. 3 months after her wedding. And she wasn’t even trying.

I’m not proud - but that is what IF does to you. Blessedly, I’m pregnant now too - and haven’t had any issues - she, on the other hand, has been throwing up daily, having major problems sleeping, and big allergy issues. I smile a bit when she calls to complain about how hard her pregnacy is. And then I feel a little evil.

]]> By: emily http://www.eggdroppost.com/2008/07/22/a-funny-thing-happened-on-the-way-to/#comment-788 emily Tue, 22 Jul 2008 14:16:49 +0000 http://69.89.22.108/~eggdropp/?p=352#comment-788 i tend to get immediately pissed off.. jealous and angry.. when i see pregnant women or hear about a new one, especially in a situation like that. i can't help it. it just isn't fair. visiting from ICLW :) i tend to get immediately pissed off.. jealous and angry.. when i see pregnant women or hear about a new one, especially in a situation like that. i can’t help it. it just isn’t fair.

visiting from ICLW :)

]]> By: Star http://www.eggdroppost.com/2008/07/22/a-funny-thing-happened-on-the-way-to/#comment-787 Star Tue, 22 Jul 2008 13:54:53 +0000 http://69.89.22.108/~eggdropp/?p=352#comment-787 If you feel nothing but pure joy 99.9% of the time, then I wager you feel non-joyful less often than 99.9% of the IF world in situations such as the one you've described. Meaning, you're clearly a kind person, and also, it's okay to have these feelings. Any kind of life challenge makes me wonder "why me?" and not that person over there who is waving her good fortune in my face. If you feel nothing but pure joy 99.9% of the time, then I wager you feel non-joyful less often than 99.9% of the IF world in situations such as the one you’ve described. Meaning, you’re clearly a kind person, and also, it’s okay to have these feelings. Any kind of life challenge makes me wonder “why me?” and not that person over there who is waving her good fortune in my face.

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